Posted by anonymous on March 25, 1999 at 07:00:19:
I don't know where to turn. My fiancee has told me not to call or visit right now. She is 3 weeks into episode of clusters. They are very different this time...random, day or night. Some mild, some severe. I have been trying to help, research, getting oxygen when her Dr. was reluctant, etc. But maybe I've been trying too hard? She says she wants to do this alone...it makes her angry to know that when I go home, I get to go to sleep while she has to wait for the CH to come, then finally will get some sleep after, but usually wake up early with the shadows or another mild CH.
I feel so helpless, lost, and in some ways responsible for the pain and weariness she feels. I only want to help. I only want to lessen the burden on her and to help with her 14 year old son. I love them both dearly, and this is eating me alive. I know what she is experiencing is so far and beyond anything I can comprehend...she tells me I will never know what it is like, day after day after day.
Well, thanks for letting me get this out...