Posted by A.M (172.150.45.70) on August 16, 2001 at 19:56:10:
Thank you for the kind words and encouragement.
When I posted that last night I hadn't slept in four days.
My lowest point came last week when a co-worker had to take me to the ER. She decided the local clinic would be better. We walked in (well I stumbled) to have a nurse hand me a clip board with about 10 pages to fill out. Can you imagine? I scrawled the word PAIN across it and handed it back to her clutching my head demanding to see the doctor. She told me to have a seat.
After what seemed like forever (I'm sure it was only a minute)she informed me that the doctor was on his way in and it would be a little while. No words of comfort, not offer of assistance. I turned to my co-worker and begged her to take me to an actual hospital.
Once in a real ER (second one of the week) the doctor promptly said, "Migraine!" and ordered a shot of Imitrex. He shut off the light and went out. About 10 horrible minutes later a nurse with a frown came in jabbed my arm and left.
An hour later, I'm still crying in pain, they come to check on me and say, "Still hurt?"
"No, I just like the taste of my tears."
"Yes! Damnit! I'm still in pain! Would you please cut off my head NOW!"
"Oh, my!" Says the doctor. "I guess I'll get the neurologist on call."
Off he goes.
I know I sound like I wasn't very nice. I wasn't. This was the second ER of the week and I was frazzled.
Finally I could feel it begin to recede. The nurse came in and gave me another shot, some sort of steroid and left again.
After a few hours the doctor came back to tell me that they couldn't get the neurologist to see me that day and that I would have to see one the next morning.
Long story short here: didn't get to see that neurologist, called another one, they worked me in, and this doctor says, "Clusters, leading to Migraines, very rare, lets try drugs and see you back here in a week."
That was 6days ago. Now I'm on: Verapamil 1xday, Prednisone 3xday, Neurontin 3xday and a couple others.
The Prednisone is kicking my ass. I'm scared of the Neurontin and the Verapamil makes me feel like I'm walking through mud.
I'm thinking this is hell. I'm thinking that somewhere back in time I really died from the pain and this is what hell is like.
Last night I finally got some sleep, about four whole hours. All day today I had painful little tickles in my head threatening to bring with it that searing bolt of red hot misery I've started to expect each day.
Thank you again for all your words of comfort. Its a good feeling to know that I'm not the only one out there and that I'm not crazy and that its not COFFEE or STRESS or being WHIMPY. You have a great community here and I look forward to visiting when I can see straight. =)