Posted by Barb D (152.163.201.207) on July 22, 2001 at 07:51:23:
In Reply to: What can spouses/partners do? posted by Andy on July 21, 2001 at 20:37:12:
I need to be alone, but that's me. We're all different, so you'll have to ask her what she wants you to do. Don't be surprised if she won't tell you. We're kinda closed mouthed about talking to those close to us about this disease.
Just be around, but unless she asks for something, don't offer. Sometimes a touch or even a word will set us off on a rant. Don't get offended and don't take anything personal. The pain we experience is indescribable. After it subsides, we're exhausted and NEED REST. At that time you might can help her, but don't be surprised if she just wants to be left alone then also.
My heart goes out to supporters. I didn't realize how hard it is on supporters until I saw another clusterhead go through a CH. My first instinct was to reach out to them, knowing that was NOT the thing to do. I know how I felt when I reached out to Kip when I saw him being hit and he told me to F*() off. And I understood WHY. I can only imagine how you are feeling.
Hang in there. Some of the supporters on this board can help you more than the clusterheads.
Hugs BD